I'll make the most of loving you
by GraceBe
Summary: Set during the CS of S6. Isobel & Dickie Merton and their first night in Crawley House. Contains spoilers for the CS.


_**Happy New Year everyone!**_

 _ **Have fun with this little story. I certainly enjoyed writing it :-)**_

 _ **I also have to thank my beta Gemenied for editing this. Thanks to her my writing looks a whole lot better than it is!**_

 **I'll make the most of loving you**

Crawley House, September 1925

Right after her return from the hospital, Isobel rushed upstairs to talk to Dickie. She was full of adrenaline, energy, and fresh hope. He had moved into her house only two hours ago and she had already arranged everything that needed to be done.

On the staircase Isobel met one of her maids who was carrying a tray. With a suspicious look she checked the almost untouched plate.

"I'm afraid his Lordship wasn't very hungry," the maid explained. "He's very tired."

"I see," Isobel sighed and gave her a nod, "Take it downstairs. Perhaps he'll eat something later."

"Yes, Ma'am."

The maid left and Isobel went to Dickie's room. It had once been Matthew's bedroom and it hadn't been used ever since he had moved to the Abbey after his wedding. It was larger and much sunnier than her own bedroom and she wanted Dickie to be as comfortable as possible. She entered the room on her tiptoes just in case he would already be asleep, but she found him awake. He was searching for something in the drawer of his bedside cabinet and was oblivious to her presence.

"Dickie?" she asked softly. "How are you feeling?"

He startled and seemed a little shocked to see her. "I'm afraid, I'm not quite sure about how I feel."

Instantly worried Isobel closed the door and went to him. "What's wrong?"

He sighed and leaned back into this pillow, "I'm not sure this is right."

Isobel sat down next to him and took his hand. "What exactly?" she asked softly.

He looked around. "Me... in your house. As things are, we don't know, if I'll make it to the altar, before people start gossiping, and then there's..." he broke off and looked down onto his hands.

"What else?" she asked softly.

"You deserve a man who isn't on his deathbed."

"Stop talking such nonsense!" she said firmly. "You are not about to die just yet! I just went to see Doctor Clarkson and he will drop by tomorrow morning. Together we will work out a proper diet for you."

He chuckled bitterly. "And what good will that do?"

"It can help to improve your condition," Isobel explained. "I'm pretty sure Amelia and her famous doctor from Harley Street never told you about this!"

Dickie preferred not to comment on that and so Isobel continued. "And tomorrow afternoon Reverend Travis will come for tea." She reached out to touch his cheek. "We'll get married as soon as possible," she said tenderly. "And nobody will change that."

Moved he took her hand into his and kissed it gently. "Are you sure it's not just pity?"

Isobel swallowed. She had known the question would come up sooner or later and the whole time she had asked herself how to answer it without hurting him.

"No." She slowly shook her head, rose and removed her shoes. Speechless Dickie watched her, as she walked around the bed and settled down next to him. She wrapped her arm around his chest and snuggled up against him.

"I've made a mistake, you know," she said quietly. "I should never have turned you down in the first place. My only excuse is, that I was scared and that it made me blind for how much I really love you." She felt how her throat became tight and a first tear was escaping her eye. She thought she was done with crying, now that she had him safely by her side, but apparently she wasn't. She wished she didn't have to. The last thing she wanted, was burdening him with her sadness.

"I'm so sorry it took me so long to come to my senses! I feel so foolish!"

More tears were streaming over her face now and when he noticed them, he pulled her even closer to kiss her forehead. "Please, don't cry. I've loved you from the moment I've first laid my eyes on you and I always will."

"But we've missed so much time because of me. I should never have allowed Larry or anyone else to keep me away from you."

"You had reason to be scared, I guess," Dickie admitted. "But now that Larry and Amelia got what they wanted, they won't bother you anymore."

Isobel lifted her head a little and caressed his cheek with her thumb. "I won't care as long as they don't bother you. I want you to make the best of whatever time is left for you and I'll do whatever I can to make that happen."

"Are you sure you want this?" he asked.

"I've never been so sure of anything," she said and leaned in to kiss him. After a little hesitation he returned the kiss and she melted against him.

"I love you," she whispered when they broke apart. "And I want to be with you." She kissed him again and then she smiled at him and said, "And now try to sleep. I'll be back soon."

He chuckled, "Aye, Mrs Crawley. I'll do as you say."

* * *

The clock struck ten o'clock when Isobel left her own bedroom and made her way down the hallway to Dickie's room. She had spent over an hour to pick a nightgown that she considered suitable enough for Dickies' eyes. She hadn't had to worry about such things in ages and decided it was high time to change that.

She knocked softly at his door, held her breath, and waited until he called her in. He was sitting in bed, an open book in his hands. His jaw dropped a little, when he noticed she had already changed into her night clothes and her hair was down, only held together by a soft ribbon.

"Is something wrong?" he asked.

She shook her head, "No. I just thought you might not want to be alone." She gave him a meaningful smile and slowly took off her robe.

He swallowed and his nowadays pale face coloured, "Do you actually intend to sleep here?"

"Unless you don't want me to..." she placed her robe at the end of the bed. "Should I go?" she asked with a twinkle in her eye that was more of a cover for her own nervousness than a sign of confidence. She had never offered herself to man like this before and briefly asked herself where she had found the courage to do so. It only took him a second to answer, "Don't you dare!" he dropped the book onto the floor and pushed the blanket aside.

"You never cease to amaze me," he said when she slipped in next to him.

"Well, I thought since everybody will assume the worst of us anyway, we can do whatever we like," she answered with nervous chuckle and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"You really don't do things by half-measures, do you?" he asked, as he pulled her against him.

Isobel shook her head, "Not if I can help it." She kissed him, first softly and then with growing passion. Her nervousness faded the longer they kissed and was slowly replaced by growing desire. It had been so long since she had given herself to a man and her feelings threatened to overwhelm her. They sank deeper into the pillows and he carefully rolled her onto her back.

"Are you sure you don't want to wait until we're married?" he asked huskily. Isobel shook her head. "I want you now. God knows, we've wasted too much time already." She gently pulled his head down, urging him to kiss her again.

"Just promise me, you won't tell Reverend Travis I compromised your virtue."

"Oh, I think he already knows I'm past help," she joked and added quietly. "Don't say you've never thought about it before."

"About making love to you? I think I've thought about it every day since I met you." The answer broke her heart. She closed her eyes when he kissed her and allowed herself to get carried away by the emotions he awoke in her. She moaned softly into his mouth when his hand finally found the way underneath her nightgown and fondled her naked skin.

This is heaven, she thought when she helped him to remove her nightgown.

"My Darling... my life..." his husky voice caressed her ear, as his lips travelled sensually over her chin and down her throat. "I love you." He traced her soft curves, like an adventurer explored an undiscovered country and soon she found herself in a state of arousal that she had almost forgotten existed.

"And I love you," she answered and ran her fingers through his hair. She didn't know how much time they would have left, but she wanted them to be the happiest times of both of their lives and tonight was only the beginning.

 **The End**

 **Let me know what you think!**


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